On June 30th I attended the first Social Media Day celebration at the Orange County Register offices in Santa Ana, CA. This day was set in motion by blogger extraordinaire, Pete Cashmore and founder of Mashable.

The goal of Social Media Day as stated on Mashable:

. . .we acknowledge and celebrate the revolution of media becoming social. A day that honors the technological and societal advancements that have allowed us to have a dialogue, to connect and to engage not only the creators of media, but perhaps more importantly, one another.

It’s a day to celebrate the changes in media that have empowered us to stay connected to information in real time, the tools that have enabled us to communicate from miles apart, and the platforms that have given a voice to the voiceless and victims of protest injustice.

While I’m a big fan of social media and have enjoyed meeting so many friends from around the world through it, it’s important to not just meet people, but to connect. That’s not as likely to happen with thousands at one time, but it is possible to connect with one person at a time.

Meeting people and exchanging emails, Twitter handles and Facebook IDs, is like waving. Waving gets your attention and establishes the first point of contact.

Connecting on a deeper level is like holding hands and is much more satisfying and leads to happier relationships.

How do you move from waving to holding hands?

1. Learn about the other person.

Social media makes this very easy. Just check their Facebook wall and tweets. Follow the links to their websites and blogs, sign up for their newsletters and start to understand their activities, business endeavors and goals.

While some people favor keeping personal and business separated, there are benefits to discovering the family person behind a business or public persona. You will better appreciate their perspective on life when they disclose some of their family interactions, challenges and triumphs.

As you get to know more about the people you have met through social media and other means, you will discover some share your interests, some are very interesting and some send out a strong positive vibration.

2. Engage with the people who interest you.

When you resonate with the people you meet, respond to their posts and emails with your reactions and comments to their thoughts.

Going beyond that, actively share with them information, ideas, opportunities and sources you believe will interest them.

This morning, for example, I just sent links to sites that I thought would interest my friends who are involved in marketing their books. Almost everyday I share links, tips and resources that I believe would help or interest a friend.

3. Connect in person over time.

I’m a member of Couchsurfing.com that connects travelers and the communities they live in. When one of our members from India announced last year that he would be in the Pacific Northwest visiting his daughter, the members in that region planned a party to celebrate his visit.

I flew to Seattle, WA and joined about 30 other Couchsurfers from around the world to welcome him and get to know each other face to face after years of corresponding on message boards online. We not only had a pajama party complete with delicious food and a movie, but we extended our fun by sightseeing over the next few days in Seattle area.

You don’t have to travel across country or even across the state, of course, to connect with people. You can make lunch, museum or movie dates with folks you’ve met who live in your city. Even chatting by phone brings a closer connection.

Major chain restaurants and coffee shops encourage these meet-ups by making you feel comfortable to stay and chat. Since they have liberal hours, you can schedule a breakfast, lunch or evening get-together.

Your goal is to get together to share interests and experiences. That requires a lot of listening on your part and patience to attend to what you are learning.

I’m not advocating that you create a string of romantic relationships, although that’s your choice. I’m suggesting building strong, rich and happier personal and business relationships initiated by mutual interests, developed by quality engaged time and eventually cemented by trust and admiration.

So what are you waiting for?

Stop waving and start holding hands.