Color Your Life Happy

Do you sabotage your own plans to change? So many of us do by setting up a massive, long-term plan that our subconscious just can’t embrace.

Example: a plan to lose 100 lbs is a wonderful goal, but is much more manageable if thought of in small increments such as 1-2 lbs a week.

You see, as soon as you announce a weight-loss plan to your body it starts to fear it will starve and makes its own plans–storing up for the famine. But if we take small attainable steps our body will cooperate rather than resist.

Since any such plan requires changes in our habits and daily behavior, it’s so much easier to change one small thing than to try to turn our world upside down in one day.

Get ideas for making small meaningful changes in your life starting today and in small ways:

• How to Strip 10 Years Off Your Age  
• A Fail-Proof Way to Reach Your Goals
• Widen Your Comfort Zone

The biggest secret to success is that there is no secret. But there are some common traits and behaviors that successful people seem to share.

Richard St. John shares what he has learned about success from hundreds of interviews with successful people. Watch this 3 minute video where he’ll share what he discovered.

Photo by Alan Light (license) 

We all seek success whether openly or secretly.

But there is one thing most of us are not ready for when it comes.

The backlash.

When you finally get the job you trained for, the house you dreamed of, the relationship you attracted, you can bet that everyone will not be happy for you. Some will even hate you and speak evil of you.

Others will even go so far as to praise you one week and be a willing party to your crucifixion the next (Remember Jesus.)

What causes this paradox?

1. To succeed you must make choices. When you make choices, you invariably leave behind the choices not made. Mixed in among those choices are people who are still back there at the crossroads you left behind.

 In a television interview Whoopi Goldberg once shared how surprised and saddened she was by the friendships she couldn’t hold onto once she became famous. She remembered that when she was a struggling comedian beset with many life challenges, she and her buddies always said they would treat each other to a fantastic dinner and invite each other to their mansions when they became wealthy.

Once Whoopi became successful, some of her buddies from the old days would allow themselves to enjoy her success, so they declined invitations.

2. To succeed you must take action. People who are unwilling to take the actions that lead to success often feel betrayed by you.

Many years ago I took a writing class that was offered free as part of a community services program. The teacher offered us leads to magazines that were looking for writers.  The next morning I called the editor and got a writing assignment.

As soon as I finished talking to the editor, I got a call from my teacher congratulating me, not for getting the assignment, but for following up on the lead. She indicated that she always followed up on the leads she gave her students. I was the only one in that class who followed the lead.

3. To succeed you must change.Those who want to keep the status quo are afraid of how your changes will affect your relationship with them.

A number of my returning college students shared stories of marital upset brought on by their return to school.
One doctoral candidate, for example, indicated that her husband was supportive of her the first semester, but by the second semester began to withdraw his support. He seemed to feel so threatened by her determination to complete her degree that he threw up as many roadblocks as he could.  He refused to watch their two children in the evenings she was in class. Increasingly he withdrew more and more support. Eventually he threw out the ultimatum: “It’s either the doctorate or me.”

 She successfully completed her doctorate three years later.

The backlash that can follow success is not about you at all.  It’s about the inner turmoil of those who wrongly believe that your success in some way diminshes them. It doesn’t, of course.

Even though the weak and fearful will not be able to share your joy, continue to progress toward your goals, make good choices and enjoy your success.  Some people you will never meet will be inspired by you, and that makes all the difference in the world.

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This article was inspired by a post, Oprah’s Top 7 Tips for Creating the Life You Want, on The Positivity Blog.  Of the 14 readers who commented before I did, almost half lashed out at Oprah’s success.

Life-enhancing ideas often pop up in unlikely places.

This occurred to me while watching the movie “The Ball” one of the short films chosen to be shown on Pangea Day. In the film, thousands of children in Mozambique found a way to use a product that clearly was not the manufacturer’s intent. Business people like to call this repurposing, but for these children it’s just a practical way to reach their goal.

As children, many of us found ways to create fun play time with simple items and techniques just like the children in the movie.  As we grew up, however, we often opted for not-as-good, but ready-to-go alternatives.

Those of us living in cities and towns with easy access to a multitude of products and services often trade money for saving time and enjoying convenience.  The more money we have the more we trade. In the process of easy fixes, perhaps we lose something. (Read my contradition here.)

People with limited means and/or access are forced to be resourceful and clever, but perhaps in the end are happier with their simpler more straightforward lives.

Enjoy this cute movie. Then think of resourceful, low-cost, clever ways to reach your goals and enjoy a simpler, happier life.

The Internet is loaded with wonderful articles, stories and tips for improving your life. I’ve gathered a few links to give you a shortcut to the inspiration from other authors and bloggers.

Times Change–A Short Story on Looking to the Future 
Cameron explores how we look at music and other things differently in retrospect.

20 Questions You Need to Ask Your Surgeon Before You or Your Loved Ones Have Surgery 
Millions of Americans have surgery every year and most of it is elective. You will not only want to read this, but also pass it to your friends and loved ones.

Stop Using the Rewind Button and Visualize What You Want
When you start making changes in your life whether for good or bad, your subconscious will kick into survival mode. Find out what to do.

Who Wants to be Rich?
What do you think is at the top of the list of what most people want?

Ghandi’s Top 10 Fundamentals for Changing the World
Guess what you have to change first in order to change the world

14 Reasons to Become More Conscious
Going beyond spiritual issues, these tips are about enhancing your daily life.

4 Reasons You Should Meditate and How to Get Started
Once you grasp how meditation positively affects your life, you won’t have trouble getting started.

How Your Income Grows as Your Personal Development Grows
Discover how income and personal development are related.

 Why Your Loved Ones Want You to Fail
You’ll be surprised at some of these reasons.

Six Steps to Become Assertive and Nice
Yes, you can do both at once.

Jonathan Field’s Best of the Web Roundup
For more inspiration and entertainment, check out the 20+ links Jonathan has rounded up

It’s inevitable that as we get older we will attend more funerals.  There’s nothing like watching our friends and age-mates succumb to illnesses or die of natural causes to remind us of our own mortality.

 One of my friends uses these funerals to remind her to keep busy enjoying her life.

She says, “Everytime I return from a funeral I book another cruise.”
 
You may not long for cruises, but surely there’s something you’ve always wanted to do. If you don’t do it now, when are you going to get it done?
 
Maybe you’ve always wanted to pursue a certain hobby, or write your life story, climb a mountain, or travel by rail across the US or have fabulous dinner parties. The possibilities are endless.
 
I can already hear your objections: 

• I don’t have the money
• I don’t like traveling alone
• I don’t know anyone to go with me to the (fill in the blanks)
• I’m too old and can’t move around fast anymore
• I’m afraid to fly.
• I’m afraid to drive
• I don’t like public transportation. 

For just a moment pretend none of your objections exist. What would you love to do?

1. Make a list.
2. Since we’re imagining, make your list as long as you want.
3. Make your wishes as elaborate as you want.
4. Now, pick one of those wishes from your list and make a list under it of all the things you would have to do to have that wish come true.
    

I’ll give you an example of one that was on my list years ago: Travel to Europe. What did I need to do to make this happen?

• get a passport
• pick a country
• look up airfares
• look up organized tours going to that country
• check out prices of tours
• select a tour
• investigate my finances to see if I could comfortably afford trip
• talk to others who have been to get tips
   
  Now make a list for each of the items on this list identifying what you need to do to accomplish this goal. For example,

To get a passport I needed to find out

• where do you get passports
• price of  passports
• application process
• what else is involved

By the time you get to this third level list, you will see that there are a number of things you can do today or tomorrow.
 
For example, It costs only a few minutes of time to find out where to get passports. If you have access to a computer, you can find out all you need to know about passports or anything else in a short period of time.
 
If you don’t have access to a computer, your local library does. The librarian will be happy to help you find what you’re looking the information you need.
 
This is just the start, of course. But drilling your lists down and your objections will begin to evaporate.
 

Get busy, start on that first list. Then leave a comment here about how this is working for you.