Archives for February 2010

Disregard Sensible Advice

Looking over dangerous cliff by jazzmanna from flickr

Looking over dangerous cliff by jazzmanna from flickr

A slow death comes for those who don’t revolt when they’re unhappy in their work or in love. Who don’t risk the certain for the uncertain in order to follow a dream. Who don’t allow themselves, at least once in their life, to disregard sensible advice. –Pablo Neruda

Taking sensible advice is what most of us were raised to do.

• Finish your dinner
• Get a good job
• Don’t talk to strangers
• Be satisfied
• Don’t travel abroad, it’s not safe

Although good advice is well-intentioned, following it does not always lead to personal happiness.

• Finishing your dinner can lead to overeating, heartburn and obesity.
• Getting a good job that bores and stresses does not build character, just more upset.
• As for strangers, isn’t everyone except your mother a stranger until you meet them?
• Being satisfied would bring an abrupt halt to invention.
• It’s not safe to get on the freeway either, but we must do it to get where we’re going

When your heart and mind are longing to go in a new direction, you will experience some discomfort, fear and even hesitation. After all, when entering new territory we can expect to find the terrain and language unfamiliar. But when you feel that strong pull toward a new idea, creation or endeavor that makes you tingle with excitement, disregard sensible advice. It’s NOT doing what you love that you will later regret.

Try Singing in the Rain

When I finished reading Tolle’s book,  A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose, I looked for ways to stay in the Present . Rather than dwell on the past or look to the future, Tolle reveals that it’s only by staying in the Now, in the Present, that we can experience joy, consciousness and our life purpose.

When I watched Usher’s tribute to Gene Kelly in the remake of the classic “Singing the Rain,” I didn’t know at first why it resonated so with me.  Now I do.

It gave me great joy to see a young performer exhibit the tremendous talent to capture the essence of the original performance but in his own soulful way.

It also gave me tremendous pride to see Usher’s talent span so many genres and generations.

But most of all, I realized that singing in the rain keeps you in the present. Try it next time it rains.  In the meantime, take a walk in the sunshine.

For now enjoy this video putting Kelly and Usher together.

Get a Buddy or Coach for Motivation and Productivity

Photo by crossfitpeachtree on flickr

Photo by crossfitpeachtree on flickr

Even the most industrious of us can benefit from an occasional push to get or keep us going.

My efforts to get out and walk for exercise, for example, were sporadic until I joined a neighbor who walks her dog. We both were happy to join forces because it’s just easier to show up when someone else is expecting you. Even though we have had days when one or the other has to cancel because of our schedules or vacations,  we have rolled with the changes and consider our walk as a priority.

One of my writing goals was to create quality articles frequently and in a more timely manner. When I heard of Jeff Herring’s 100 Articles in 100 Days Challenge I jumped on board and began to churn out articles faster using his videos, ideas and the camraderie of the other participants. There were no prizes  other than the gratification and sharpened skills at the finish line in July 2009.

In the early stages of writing my book, Color Your Life Happy, I worked with a motivational coach who gave me ideas and encouragement, and was my accountability partner. As I moved closer to the later phases I hired a publishing coach who gave me more specific tips, guidance, inspiration and again, was my accountability partner.

Why does coaching help?

Look at the top achievers in the world, such as Tiger Woods and Tony Robbins and others in sports and entertainment. Even though they live their passion and enjoy dream lives, they have coaches. As a matter of fact, I didn’t make as much progress in my own coaching and writing career until I hired a coach.

Is coaching for you?

Are you working toward a goal and pursuing your passion? Do you sense that you could use an accountability partner, a sounding board and a gentle guide. I urge you to consider getting a coach or buddy to help you stay motivated and increase your productivity.

I have a few coaching slots available in my practice. I’d be delighted to help you set priorities, make action plans and achieve the success you deserve. Get a complimentary session, then decide. Learn more here.

Anti-Valentine Day Sentiment is Bonanza for Goodwill

Heart by Gabriela Camerotti on flickr

Heart by Gabriela Camerotti on flickr

While many are scampering to gather gifts, flowers and candy to give loved ones on Valentine’s Day, others are ready to dump items that recall memories of relationships gone awry.

Just in time, one Goodwill created a campaign encouraging you to donate those unwanted mementos to them. The Colonial Park, PA Goodwill was accepting rings, monogrammed towels, and wedding gowns yesterday at their Dump Your Ex’s donation drive.

While this is the first drive of this kind for Goodwill, it is common for Goodwill to accept a wide variety of items year round that are unwanted in the wake of relationships that have ended for various reasons.

So, if you have leftover items, especially valuables, and were wondering what to do with them, donate them to Goodwill and remove the clutter from your home and heart. 

Be forewarned:  Goodwill is not accepting mattresses, firearms and homemade porn.

Billboard Don’t Know Squat About Sexy Songs

Photo by Dh33dha on flickr

Photo by Dh33dha on flickr

As I was driving to a business lunch yesterday  the radio announcer began to share Billboard’s picks of the top 50 sexiest songs of all time.  (We can count on the anticipation of Valentine’s Day to bring out lists such as this.)

Different songs began to run through my head as possible picks.

I didn’t expect to completely agree with songs that made the cut, but come on–Olivia Newton John’s “Let’s Get Physical” is the sexiest song of all time?  Evidently Billboard had robots pick those songs.

As it turns out,  Billboard’s picks were selected by a robotic and moronic process.  The songs that made the list were the most popular based on each song’s performance on the Billboard Hot 100 chart (from August 4, 1958 — the inception of the Hot 100 chart — through the Jan. 16, 2010 issue) and that had anything remotely related to sex  in the lyrics.

Eew! That method of selection made for some strange bedfellows.

So, it’s not the list that was the problem, but the title of the list.  They should have called their list the Top 50 Songs That Stayed on the Billboard List Longest for God Knows What Reasons and That Mentioned Sex or Anything Remotely Related to Sex in the Lyrics.

Billboard don’t know squat about sexy songs.

A sexy song is suggestive, compelling, soul-stirring, and sometimes  steamy, throbbing and even instructive. A sexy song isn’t just a set of lyrics,  or a soulful singer, it’s  the musical lead-in and backdrop and memorable strains . Sexy songs make you want to snuggle, sway with the one you love, and finally to cut to the chase.

I agree with a few of Billboard’s picks

Number 3: I’ll Make Love to You by Boyz II Men (1994)

Number 5: Let’s Get It On Marvin Gaye

Number 22: Freak Me by Silk

Number 36: Bump and Grind by R. Kelly

but no list of sexy songs can be taken seriously without songs by Luther Vandross, Teddy Pendergrass and Barry White.

When you walk into a room and your lover is playing  “If Only for One Night” by Luther Vandross,  “Turn Off the Lights” by Teddy Pendergrass or “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love Baby” by Barry White there is no mystery about how where your evening is headed.

Okay, I know some of you can’t wait to set me straight.  Let me have it.